Wednesday, July 13, 2011
I've been feeling kinda yucky ok more yucky than usual these last few days. Other than the roasting of veggies I've not made many real strides in the cooking world. Been just moving along at neutral speeds and trying to get through these days. I did have lunch with a friend yesterday who hadn't seen me since before I started the diet and she did say she saw a difference. I"m of course afraid that everyone is just being nice and just saying it but there is this quiet voice inside who keeps replying that I have indeed lost weight... I mean my clothes are falling off and I"m sticking to the diet like white on rice. So I know there is a difference. I'm just scared that I will return to what I was which was very unhealthy and I do not want to go back to that. But what if I am not strong enough to keep myself healthy? What if I forget how hard this was and what a struggle this is? It's happened before. I had knee surgery and they told me I had to continue to loose weight and I didn't. It isn't like I didn't try because I did try but it still kept piling on and I kept taking the meds the doctors gave me which made me just that much more sicker and that much more heavy. So many have times I've kicked myself but I really didn't know the way to save myself. This struggle is the most important struggle of my life. I must fight because I know I'm worth it and this diet has turned things around for me. I am very thankful for it!