Wednesday, February 15, 2012

It's a question of Identity...

When my father retired from working at the phone company he was made to take 2 years off from working as part of his retirement/separation plan. At some point he start to have issues of identity. Who was he if he wasn't a phone guy. How does one define ones self if ones self is so tied up in the title that one has had for most of ones life?

I watched him suffer depression and confusion. He went on and with my mother bought a glass company and became a great boss. Still, I believe Dad suffered  issues with identity the rest of his life.

I bring this point up because I too am suffering from a question of identity. What defines me as me. What do I want the world to know about me and what don't I want them to know. The biggest of all the questions about identity I have is who or what do I want to be.

Do you remember when you were just starting out? It could of been your first job or going off to college or moving out of your parents place. That feeling that anything is possible? I am sorta experiencing that feeling all over again. I don't know where I'll end up or what I'll do but I have this feeling if I really wanted to I could do anything be anything and be anyone I wanted and that is a powerful feeling to have. It certainly makes all this upset over the denial worth going through.

Some definitions of me:
Woman
White
Middle Class
Lesbian
Poet
Artist
Writer
Philosopher
Dreamer


As I heal and grow I know I will remember or add more names to the list...

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